So frustrated

Today was supposed to be round 5 of 6 chemotherapies for me. I was scheduled for my normal time of 12:00, well at 9:30 I got a call from the office stating that my platelet counts are too low for me to recieve chemo today. GREAT! We will try again next week. I don't want this to drag out, I don't want to try again next week, I want to get round 5 today and be one step closer to the end. I was just at work yesterday talking to my boss about a return date to work and getting things in order to start my life again and BAM cancer has a differnt plan. Why can't things just go smoothly, I am already dealing with more than I can handle and now I am going to sit around and worry about my low counts, and about not achieveing optimal results from the chemo because everything is being delayed a week. My last chemo was supposed to be on July 21, now it is on July 28 (if my counts are normal). July 30th is my niece's birthday, I don't want to be sick for her birthday, I wanted to be done everything and be on the road to recover by her b-day, not laying on my couch crying because of how horrible I feel, I really want to scream and punch something. I don't want everything delayed a week, my surgery has to be one month after chemo so I am now looking at September. I know one week may not seem like a big deal but for me it is huge. I am soooo over all of this. Not to mention I took 4 steroids yesterday in prep for today so I get to enjoy all the lovely side effects of them for no good reason. In time I will calm down a bit and realize that its ok, fourth of July has always been one of my favorite holidays and fireworks hold a special meaning to me, it was during the grand finale of the fireworks at the Inner Harbor that Ryan asked me to marry him. So, I guess on the bright side I won't be sick for fireworks this year.